How to Make Him Fall for You
by Libby.not.a.slave.to.fashion
Summary: Maylene has a very big secret. A very big secret that no one can ever know about. Her secret is that she's madly in love with the Phantomhive butler, Sebastian Michaelis. Okay, so maybe it's not that big of a secret...
1. How to Make Him Fall For You

**How to Make Him Fall for You.**

Maylene has a very big secret. A very big secret that no one can ever know about. Her secret is that she's madly in love with the Phantomhive butler, Sebastian Michaelis. Okay, so maybe it's not that big of a secret...

Maylene was running errands for the Phantomhive household. The Young Master had asked her to buy him a book called "How Much More?" She had never heard of this book, but according to the young master, it was a very popular book a friend had suggested he read. Not thinking to far into it, Maylene headed to the bookstore. She asked the clerk if he had the book in stock, and he looked at her strangely, but told her were it would be.

_The romance section?_

Maylene thought, getting a little suspicious of the Young Master. No Earl she knew would read a romance novel. She walked down the rows, the books sorted alphabetically by title. She slowed her pace as she approached the H section, and stopped as she saw the first book beginning with How, "How come?", followed by "How did he?" and "How did he steal my heart?" at the bottom of the bookcase were multiple copies of two different books, "How to Make Him Fall for You", and "How Much More?". She first looked at the "How to Make Him Fall for You". She pulled it off the shelf. It seemed to be a legitimate how to manual, on the cover it said it had an almost 100% guaranty. Her eyes lit up.

_Maybe with this book I can finally have Sebastian love me!_

Maylene thought, smiling to herself. She grabbed the book the Young Master wanted and ran to the check out.

"Did you find everything you wanted?" The clerk coughed, glancing at the book the young Earl wanted.

"Yes, thank you!" Maylene said smiling brightly. The clerk blushed slightly, looking away from the maid. After she had paid for the books, she skipped off to the Phantomhive mansion. She pulled out the book the Young Master wanted, remembering the odd placing it had. She opened it to page 69, and began reading. Her eyes widened under her glasses, a blush creeping up her face. A small trickle of blood fell from her nose and she slammed the book closed.

_Oh. My. God._

Maylene thought, staring down at the book she had bought for the Earl.

**--**

"Young Master! I don't think it's very appropriate for you to be reading this kind of book!" Maylene said loudly, walking into the young Phantomhive's study. The boy sat there with his butler behind him. They both looked up as Maylene entered the room.

"What are you talking about?" Ciel Phantomhive said in a commanding voice that caused Maylene to shrink back a bit.

"Well, um..." Maylene stuttered.

"Speak up!" He ordered.

"Well... It's this book, Young Master! How can an Earl of your standing be caught dead with this kind of book!" Maylene said with a small burst of confidence that diminished as she turned the book over to the child. He looked up at the maid staring at him, then opened the book to a random page. His visible eye moved as he read a sentence before his eye grew wider.

"What the hell!?" He yelled, pushing the book off the table, a appalled look on his face. "That's disgusting!" He said. He then turned to Sebastian and glared. "You..!"

"Now, now, Young Master, we must stay calm," Sebastian said, a smirk on his face as he saw the anger in his master's eye.

"Maylene. Out. Now." The Earl commanded, never looking away from his butler.

**--**

Maylene sighed, walking off to her room, the new book in her hand. She opened the door and jumped on her bed, opening to the first page;

**--**

_**i**_

_**Getting Him to Notice You.**_

_The best way to get anyone to notice you is sex-appeal. Don't get me wrong, you shouldn't go around half-dressed, strutting your stuff. Wear normal clothes, but let him see a little bit more than he should. The best way to go about this is falling. Fall in such a way that he sees your legs. Blush, then hide yourself._

**--**

Maylene blushed a moment, imagining the scene she would create for her beloved butler. Plans and ideas ran through her head until the moment she fell asleep and continuing in her dream land.

**--**

Maylene smiled as she watched the hallway for the man she loved. She had planned everything last night, it was all ready, as simple as it was, she was confident it would work. She had placed a banana peal in the hallway and when Sebastian was in view she would come running and slip on the peal. Of course she would get slightly hurt, maybe a bruise or two, but it would be worth it if Sebastian even noticed her a little bit.

Sebastian walked down the hall, sighing. This was her chance!

"Sebastian! Sebastian!" She called running down the hall at full speed. Sebastian looked up, surprised. Everything was working! All she had to do was step on the peal. But just as she was over the peal and about to step on it, she was intoxicated by his beauty and jumped right over it, right into the butler. The moment her head touched his chest and her arms wrapped around his waist she recovered her senses. He looked down at her, confused. She blushed crimson, completely humiliated and ran backwards as far as she could until her back touched the wall.

At that moment, the young Earl came walking down the hall, glaring at the butler. "Sebastian!" he yelled, "what are you doing here?! Why aren't you in my study helping me?!" the boy yelled, quickening his pace.

"Young Master!" Maylene said, noticing that he was about to step on the banana peal. He looked at her, his foot making contact with the peal. As he put his weight on the foot the peal was under, the peal slipped, causing his legs to give out from under him. Sebastian's eyes widened and within seconds he had the Earl in his arms.

"Wha! Sebastian! Put me down!" Ciel yelled, a light blush gracing his checks.

"I'm sorry my Lord, but you were about to slip on a banana peal that Maylene dropped on the floor," Sebastian's soothing voice said, glancing at Maylene, who was blushing even redder.

"Then why didn't you pick it up!?" Ciel yelled, glaring at the butler.

"I'm sorry, my Lord. I will remember next time how unobservant you are." Sebastian said, walking off, the Earl still in his arms. The young boy glared at his servant, unable to say anything in reply.

"Make sure you do."

**--**

Maylene's first plan was ruined by her stupidity and she was enraged by it. She sat on her bed, opening her book to the next chapter;

**--**

_**ii**_

_**Striking his fancy**_

_The most important thing in a relationship is attraction. The best way to 'Strike his fancy' is by acting like a slut. Men like sluttiness. If your constantly hinting that you wouldn't mind having sex with him, he will want you. You also have to have a bit of calculated neglect, show him you wouldn't mind sleeping with other men. Phrases like, 'Woof, bitch,' and 'So... exactly how BIG are you?' are very good at hinting sexiness._

**--**

Maylene plotted how she would go about saying things like this. She decided to start her plan the next day, to dazzle Sebastian with her awesome sexiness. Maylene smiled faintly as she slowly drifted off into a sleep filled with Sebastian.

**--**

"Good Mourning Maylene!" Finny shouted, as the Phantomhive maid entered the room. Maylene glanced around the room, finding her beloved leaning over a table, inspecting a table cloth. She replied;

"Woof, bitch." Finny stared at her, completely taken off guard. Sebastian straightened out and turned to Maylene, a dark look on his face.

"Maylene, I do hope your not planing on swearing in front of the young master," Sebastian said, raising an eyebrow. Maylene blushed, looking away from the man.

"N-no," she stammered, many thoughts running through her head.

_What should I do? What should I do?!_

She thought desperately. "So... um, how BIG are you anyway?" Maylene asked, looking straight into the butler's eyes, putting extra emphasis on the word 'big'. The butler stared down at her, mouth hanging open, shock written all over his face.

"What did you just say?" He asked, recovering from the shock.

"So how big are you anyway...?" Maylene said, getting a tiny bit scared of what the butler would say or do. He just stared at her.

"Well? Answer the lady," came the Young Master's voice from the door. During the scene Maylene had created, he must have walked in. "That's an order."

"Yes My Lord," Sebastian said, bowing to Ciel. "I am about this long," Sebastian said, holding his hands up to show her. Maylene's eyes widened, a huge blush threatening her unblemished cheeks. Ciel snorted, leaned on the door frame, smirking at his butler.

"Oh really?" the Young Master said, rolling his eyes. Maylene, realizing her plan had failed for the second time, hung her head and walked out the door, brushing past her master. Two more chapters. That's how many chances she had to get this right.

**--**

_**iii**_

_**Getting him interested**_

_The best way to get a man interested in having sex with you is flashing him in sexy underwear. Something red and lacy, a thong, and maybe even fishnet tights. Any man faced with this show would be struck speechless by your sexiness._

**--**

Maylene gasped, was this really going to work? Though she didn't care at this point. She jumped up and looked through her dresser. At the bottom of the drawer she had placed a false bottom. She lifted the false bottom and looked through it's contents. A framed picture of the Phantomhive butler rested next to a locket that had the same picture, as well as a picture of Maylene making a kissing face. Around those were scattered beads, nice clothes and money. Maylene grabbed the money and dashed off to town to buy the underwear she needed. She picked out a set of bra and thong with a red heart argyle patter on them. She smiled and brought them to the check-out. The clerk looked at Maylene's face and down at her body. Satisfied, she gave Maylene a discount on the unmentionables and Maylene was on her merry way.

She quickly stripped her body of it's maid's dress and pulled on the underwear. She looked at herself in the mirror. Her pale skin and large bust were almost perfectly accented by the unmentionables, it was as if they were made just for her. She smiled and grabbed a cloak. She wrapped it around her body and walked off to find Sebastian.

**--**

"Sebastian... Do you think that Maylene has been acting weird lately?" Ciel asked, looking down at his butler who was dressing him for bed.

"Yes... First with the banana peal, then that odd question this mourning and just a little while ago, she came to me while I was working, wearing a cloak. She then stripped, and when I asked her what she was doing she ran away."

"She stripped!?" Ciel yelled, climbing into bed and staring at his demon in pure shock. "Maylene?!"

"Indeed," Sebastian said, bowing to his master.

"Is she sick or something?" Ciel asked, looking disgusted.

"Maybe, but I do hope she's not sick. You may catch what she has and you know how you get if your sick, Young Master," Sebastian smirked, seeing the blush on his master's face.

"Shut up."

**--**

**--**

_**iv**_

_**If all else fails...**_

_If nothing else works, and you haven't captured his love, then it's time to bring in the cat ears! Fake cat ears and tails have been scientifically proven to make men love others. Of course you have to be wearing your sexy underwear as well!_

**--**

Maylene sighed, she really hoped this one would work, she was already making a huge fool of herself. She walked down the hall, going out to buy cat ears. She passed by Finny and Bard who were smiling and laughing. Maylene glanced at them, seeing Finny was wearing cat ears. Maylene sighed, continuing to walk. She gasped and ran back after them.

"Finny!" Maylene called, grabbing his shoulder.

"Yes, what is it Maylene?" Finny asked, startled.

"Those ears! Can I have them?" Maylene asked, grabbing them from his head.

"Sure..." Finny said, but Maylene had already run off to find Sebastian. When she found him, he was standing in the library, dusting. He looked up as Maylene entered the room, a pair of cat ears on her head.

"Sebastian!" Maylene called, undoing the buttons of her maid's dress. Sebastian stared at her intently as her dress fell, revealing her sexy undergarments. She looked in Sebastian's eyes determined not to loose this time.

"Maylene..." Sebastian said, walking closer to her. She looked at him, flinching as he came closer and closer. When he was right in front of her, she closed her eyes. "These are the Young Master's..." He said, plucking the ears off her head. She blushed, her face getting warmer and warmer. Sebastian blinked, looking down at her. He put his forehead against hers, making her blush even deeper. "You have a temperature. Are you sick?" He asked, Maylene didn't reply, she had become to dizzy to think. The room began spinning and she tipped, falling. Sebastian caught her and just before she passed out she heard him mutter, "I don't do virgins."

**--**


	2. Letter to the Author

So... I was suddenly struck with an idea to continue this story because I suddenly got an idea for Maylene to send a letter of complaint to the author, so major OC's because I just didn't feel right to put Mr. Wordsmith as the writer. This is actually my most popular FanFiction, probably because I'm not using minor characters. So, not as long as the first one, but longer than the other story I submitted today.

Maylene gasped and lurched up. She blushed wildly, remembering exactly what Sebastian had said. Was it a dream? Was it real? Maylene couldn't tell.

_ "I don't do virgins," _

That's what he said. But did he really? Then Maylene remembered the book. The book promised 100% guaranty to make him fall for her! Maylene would not stand for this! She had been completely humiliated by this book! She would write a letter to the publishing company complaining of this book! Maylene immediately grabbed a piece of paper and quill and started jotting down her frustration. It took her almost the whole day, but she finished her letter, and mailed it off to the company.

"Maylene!" Finny whined, finding her. "Where have you been? It's been so lonely without you! Sebastian said you had a fever! Are you okay now?"

"Yes, yes, I'm fine. Just a little aggravated."

**--**

A letter was placed on the desk of author Victoria Auctor, the author of How to Make Him Fall For You. She looked at it, an eyebrow raised, then up at the man who placed it there.

"Fan-mail. Congratulations," he said, smirking.

"Oh fuck you," she said, swatting him with her newest manuscript. It wasn't that she was unpopular, it was that she wrote such scandalous things for the era. Romantic Humor about sex, SCANDALOUS! But she didn't really give a rat's ass about what people thought of her. In fact, she quite liked being scandalous. It was like her short red hair, she was proud of it. She looked at the return address, it was sent from the Phantomhive estate! There was no way the Lord Phantomhive would read her books, she'd met him once at a party. He struck her as someone who couldn't even smile, let alone enjoy a humorous book.

_So who could it really be from?_

She wondered, grabbing a letter-opener. She slit the paper and pulled the letter out gently. Looking briefly over the paper she could tell the person was enraged when they wrote it. It was also female handwriting, who could this possibly be from? So she started reading,

**--**

_Dear Andraste Scriptor, _**(This was her pen-name, a play-on-words from her real name. Her first name, Victoria, meant "Victory" in Latin, in Celtic the word was Andraste. Her last name, Auctor, was Latin for Author, as was Scriptor. She thought it was quite funny.)**

_I have read your how-to manual, entitled How to Make Him Fall For You, and quite frankly, I am appalled!_ **(Victoria was not surprised, this woman's daughter probably read it, and she caught her.)** _I followed every step to the word, and it did NOT make him fall for me!_ **(This surprised Victoria. Was this person kidding or what? It also completely amused her, anyone who would really take this book seriously would be an idiot.)** _You see, there is the most HANDSOME man in existence working at the same manner as I, and I must say, he is the most sexy man I have ever met._ **(Now this was really getting interesting!)** _The way his hair flies in his face when the wind blows, or his mysterious burgundy eyes, or his entrancing smile..._ **(There was a line from the bottom of the 'e' that went on to the edge of the page, probably put there when this woman was daydreaming about this God's-gift-to-women-man. Victoria had a good idea who this man was. The Lord Phantomhive's butler, Sebastian ****Michaelis, Victoria had had the pleasure to meet him once. He was quite sexy, but not ****really her type.****)** _Anyway! My description doesn't even tell the half of it, but you get my point? So I was picking up a book for the Young Master, entitled __How Much More?, when I came across your book, right next to it._ **(Seeing the name of the book made Victoria gasp. The Lord Phantomhive wanted **_**that**_** book?! It was famous as the most scandalous gay romance novel in the history of the romance genera, and was burned by the Church, and the author labeled a heretic. She was completely amazed they even sold it anywhere now days. It boasted steamy sex, two ways, with two or three sex-slaves, a sadist and six masochists.)** _It promised a 100% guaranty to make him fall for you, but it did not! I attempted the first chapter; falling to show my legs, which ended terribly with the Young Master in Sebastian's arms, and not me!_ **(**_**Ah, so little miss prissy disclosed his name. She was really pissed. And the Earl in his butler's arms, sound's sexy, **_**Victoria thought, smirking.)** _I also attempted the second chapter; saying things such as, "woof, bitch," and "so... exactly how BIG are you?" which ended in my complete humiliation when showed, with his hands mind you, how big he really was._ **(This made Victoria burst out laughing, causing others around her to stare in bewilderment. Though she didn't give a damn.)** _Next I did the third chapter, sexy underwear._ **(Victoria couldn't wait to find out what happened.)** _He looked at me, and asked, "What are you doing?" I was so embarrassed I ran away without a word!_ **(Again, Victoria laughed, and her co-workers just shook their heads ignoring her.)** _Finally, I tried the last and final chapter, cat ears._ **(Victoria was expecting great thins from the next few sentences.)** _I took a pair of cat ears from the gardener, and rushed to him. Immediately I stripped, and he looked at me, and he said, and I quote, "These are the Young Master's." Then he took them from me, placed his forehead against mine, and said, "You have a temperature. Are you sick?" I began to faint, and I swear he said, "I don't do virgins,"!_ **(At this, Victoria couldn't keep it in any longer. She laughed so hard she couldn't breath for a good three minutes. Just thinking about the Earl wearing cat ears amused her, let alone what Sebastian said! This was rich, just rich!)** So you see, this book has completely destroyed my reputation and life! If you do not do something about this, I will sue you for everything you own!

Sincerely Yours,

A Maid With A Grudge

**--**

After Victoria had recovered from her fits of giggles, she sat up in her chair and sighed, taking in deep breaths. She had concluded two things. One, this person was obviously trying to get her opinion of their romance comedy novel, and two, this person had a bright future in that genera.

"What is so funny?" the man that placed the letter on her desk asked, sitting on it. His name was Adam Mcloud, a sassy go-fer with a sex-fetish, that worked for the publishing company. He was a nicely built man, not too strong, but not a weakling. He had long brown hair pulled back in a pony tail, and the most amazing hazel eyes Victoria had ever seen. She smiled up at him, showing that he would have to pry it out of her.

"Come on, tell me," He wined, taking a lock of her red hair and kissing it. He loved that hair. She had no idea why, but he loved it. She shook her head no, and continued to smile. He smiled deviously back at her before pressing their lips together.

"Tell me."


	3. Note for the Reader

So, yeah number three!!! Please hold your applause to the end of the story. So yeah, Victoria is my favorite character. She's so badass! If you remember, she didn't take Maylene's letter seriously, so she thinks she's humoring a reader. There will be NO OCxSebastian or Ciel or Maylene or anyone else but the other OC.

Victoria grudgingly got up. Up out of her nice, warm bed with her nice, warm, comfortable lover, still fast asleep in it. She ran a hand through her red hair, getting it out of her face. She looked fondly down at him. No man would ever marry her if they knew what the two of them had done. But she really didn't care, she had planned to become an old maid anyhow. She remembered the letter she had received the day before and got dressed. When she got to the publishing company, she started on her reply to that letter, a small smile gracing her lips. By the time Adam got there, the letter was done. She handed it to him as he walked in.

"You weren't there when I woke up," he accused, annoyance in his voice.

"I never am," she replied coyly.

**--**

Maylene eagerly got the post, and flipped through it, looking, hoping, to get a reply from that bitch of an author. Then she saw it, the official letter from the Publishing company. She ran back in the manor, threw the remaining post at Finny, and dashed up to her room. She flung the door shut and jumped on her bed. She savagely ripped it open, and began reading the reply.

**--**

_My Dearest Maid With A Grudge,_ **(For some reason, this opening line really pissed Maylene off. She felt like she was being mocked.)**

_I have read your letter to me, with great pain, I might add._ **(Maylene bit her lip. **_**Get to the point!**_** She screamed in her head.)** _Frankly, I have no idea why my book did not help you._ **(Maylene was getting very agitated.)** _There is a man at my publishing company that is, quite frankly, the most sexiest man I have ever had the pleasure to meet, including the Phantomhive Butler._ **(Maylene gasped, there couldn't possibly be a man sexier than Sebastian!)** _His long brown hair gracefully falling over his shoulders, his sparkling hazel eyes, his perfectly angled face.._. **(There was a zig-zaged, curly-q line stretching from the bottom of the 'e' to the edge of the paper. Maylene felt like she was being mocked for some reason.)** _So I seduced him, using the techniques that I later put into my book._ **(Maylene raised an eyebrow. How could it work for this ****Andraste**** character, and not her?)** _Obviously, it worked, since I have put it into my book. Quite frankly, I have no idea how the Young Master could end up in this Gods-gift-to-women-man's arms. When I attempted that, not only did I end up in my man's arms, but I also got to peek his interest in me._ **(Maylene got a nose bleed just imagining this faceless author falling into this sex-on-legs-man's arms.)** _When I did chapter two, he got quite angered when I asked a co-worker how big he was, and punched the guy in the face when he tried to pull IT out._ **(Maylene blushed, maybe she should have asked Finny how big he was and said woof, bitch to Sebastian.)** _Well, when I wore sexy undergarments and showed him, well, let's just say it was like page 210 to page 234 in How Much More? with me on top. Your imagination is allowed to wonder._ **(Maylene almost passed out when she read that sentence. Although the Young Master ordered the book to be burned, Maylene saved it and read it all in one night. It was the sexiest book she had ever laid eyes on, and it gave her great ideas for when she finally got Sebastian in her bed. And not to mention that pages 210 to 234 were the hottest, sexiest, most arousing, provocative section in the book. It was pure sex for 24 pages, what were you expecting?)** _I didn't even have to use the cat-ears, but they are, in fact, scientifically proven to make guys want to have sex with whoever is wearing them._ **(This made Maylene sad, if it was scientifically proven, why didn't it work?)** _I am dreadfully sorry that this book did not work for you!_ **(No surprise there.)** _I am about to __release my next book, How to Make Him Fall for You II, it has a 200% guaranty to make him fall for you!_ **(Now she was talking, Maylene couldn't wait to get her next book.)** _So, please don't sue me, I'm just a poor beggar of an author!_ **(Maylene snorted, **_**Bitch**_**)** _But, if my next book doesn't win his heart for you, you can mail me again, although I think I know why this man of yours didn't have sex with you, the best answer is, he is gay. For this Young Master of yours._ **(Maylene screamed when she read this. What?! How could Sebastian love the Young Master?! Not only was he a boy and Sebastian a man, but Sebastian was almost twice Ciel's age! Although Maylene didn't know exactly how old he was.)**

_Your's truly,_

_Andraste Scriptor (A poor author who sometimes goes begging to make ends meet) _**(Maylene was incredibly enraged after reading this letter, but she still had hope. Hope that Sebastian would soon be hers.)**

**--**

Maylene placed the letter on her bed, and looked up. The door opened to reveal a scared-out-of-his-mind Finny. He timidly walked into the room and sat on Maylene's bed.

"M-Maylene?" He stuttered, taking her hand in his. "Are you okay? Have you really gotten over your fever? Maybe you shouldn't go to work today. I think you should rest for the remander of the day. I'll cover for you," Finny looked down, a little blush on his cheeks. Maylene smiled, squeezing his hand.

"I'll be fine, Finny. Really," she said, kissing his forehead. "Now you better get back to work before Sebastian finds you slacking off!" Maylene said playfully, swatting Finny with the letter. Finny laughed and jumped up.

"Okay! If you promise to take it easy!" he said, running for the door.

"I promise!" she said, smiling after him.

After all, life goes on.


	4. How to Make Him Fall For You 2

So, you all have no idea how guilty I feel. I can't even remember the last time I even wrote a story let alone updated this series. But I was really busy! I swear! -(total bullshit) Anyway, I predict maybe one or two more chapters and this story ends.

)= -(more bullshit)-

Victoria sighed in relief, tossing her finished story on her desk. It would be in print and on the shelves in a week. She was finally done.

Maylene ran to the bookstore. Today was the day that How to Make Him Fall for You II was going to be released. She desperately wanted it's advice to aid her in her attempts to win Sebastian's heart. She quickly paid for the book and ran out of the store before the clerk was even able to register that a book had been purchased. She strode back to the mansion, and made it back in record time. As soon as she got back, she pushed past Finny in the garden and ran up to her room. She locked the door and jumped on her bed to begin reading.

_Before we start this newest book of mine, I'd like to thank "A Maid With A Grudge" for writing to me of her adventures based on the previous book in this series._

Maylene scuffed, but was happy to see that the author had not forgotten her. She also liked that she got to be even a little famous, even if no one knew who she really was. She turned the page, seeing the glistening print that would lead her into her beloved butler's heart.

_**v**_

_**Lolita**_

_Most people know the story of little Lolita, whose step father, Humbert Humbert, marries her mother, __Charlotte Haze, because he fell madly in love with Lolita. Charlotte reads Humbert's diary, and, finding his real intentions, dashes across the street only to be hit by a car and die. Lolita is taken away by Humbert and raped multiple times in different hotels. Humbert Humbert was infatuated with Lolita because of her young age. Many people agree that Lolita dresses are very sexually appealing, even guys that don't go for little girls. Wearing Lolita dresses and acting completely innocent should make him become utterly infatuated. _

_(If you need to order either the book or a Lolita dress, there is an order form stuck in the back of this book.)_

Maylene stared at the book. _Lolita? Really? Oh well, I might as well try it_. She thought, standing up. She'd need to order one of those ridiculous dresses though. She couldn't risk having Nina show up while she was trying to seduce Sebastian. The two did not mix well. She flipped through the book, finding the order form. She really had no idea what she was doing, or which dress Sebastian would like better. Thinking back on what Andraste Scriptor said in her letter about the Young Master and Sebastian, she immediately ordered a dark blue Gothic Lolita dress.

A package was delivered to the Phantomhive manor. A package from "Lolita Central." You couldn't even begin to imagine what the confused delivery men where thinking. Although it didn't involve gay fantasies about the dashingly handsome butler who answered the door and the renowned Young Master at the manor, who many agreed was as beautiful as a young Lolita girl. Of course not. That's preposterous.

Sebastian looked at the package, seeing who it was from. He was dumbfounded. _Why would the Earl Phantomhive want a Lolita dress? Oh well, this could end up well for me,_ he thought, smirking.

"Young Master, a package has arrived," Sebastian said, entering the Earl's study. Ciel looked up, confused.

"A package? From who?" he asked, inspecting the package.

"Lolita Central, my Lord."

"... What?"

"A package from Lolita Central has arrived for you, Young Master," Sebastian said slowly, so Ciel could understand.

"You have a very bad sense of humor, Sebastian. This is not funny."

"I am not trying to be funny, my Lord, this package was delivered today from Lolita Central."

"Show me," Ciel commanded, glaring at the offensive butler. Sebastian handed the package to Ciel. Ciel grabbed his letter opener, and massacred the box, so that it fell into tinny bits, revealing a dark blue Gothic Lolita dress. Ciel stared at the dress, not comprehending the thing.

"Well, Young Master, are you going to put it on or what?" Sebastian asked, a perverted smirk on his lips.

Ciel glared up at Sebastian, "this is obviously not mine. Do you see how big the chest is for this dress. It is also way to long for me," Ciel said hotly.

"Ah, yes, now that you mention it, could it be Maylene's?" Sebastian asked, slightly disappointed. "I apologize for the mistake, my Lord. I will go give Maylene this amazing dress. I think it will suit her well." Ciel glared at Sebastian, only a tiny-tinny EXTREMELY bit jealous.

"I hate you, Sebastian," Ciel muttered as the door to his study closed behind his ravishing butler.

"Yes my Lord," Ciel heard the smirk in his butler's voice and growled.

Maylene heard a knock at her servant's quarter's door, and ran to open it. There stood Sebastian, in all his amazingly sexy sexiness. Maylene started to drool. "Maylene, I believe this is yours," Sebastian said, handing her the dress she ordered.

"Oh, yes, sir, it is mine," she blubbered, grabbing the dress from his hands.

Sebastian nodded, and moved to the door before turning back. "It's an incredibly beautiful dress," he said before leaving. Maylene gasped, and looked after him, turning a thousand shades of red before her body settled on crimson.

"He likes it! He likes it!" she screeched, throwing on the dress. She looked at herself in the mirror, and smiled, seeing that it was really beautiful, as Sebastian had said. She giggled excitedly, and skipped out of her room to find Sebastian. She had to look and act innocent for this to be pulled off, so she thought of ways to seem helpless, and in need of a big, strong, sexy man. "Sebastian! Sebastian!" Maylene called running up to him as he was polishing a silver tray. "How do I look?" asked, putting her hands behind her back, and doing a childish turn that sent the skirt violently up, showing her stockings. A childish movement that was both immature and scandalous at the same time.

Sebastian smiled, but his eye began to twitch. Sure, he said he liked the dress, but he only liked it because he could imagine Ciel in it. Not Maylene. "Blue is not really your color, Maylene," Sebastian said, turning back to his polishing. Maylene stood there for a moment, gaping at him, before she ran back to her room, crying.

"God damn that author! She's making a fool of me!" Maylene sobbed into her pillow. She wrenched the book from her side table and riped it open to the next chapter.

_**vi**_

_**Lesbianism**_

_If you are a homophobic do not continue reading this section._

_Guys have an unexplainable lust over girls who fuck each other. The author of this book has no idea why, but knows it has nothing to do with the fact that women have an attachment to gay men. Why would the two have anything to do with each other? Really!_

_If you find another girl who is willing, and you're really trying to get 'that man' to notice you, immediately start to make-out with the woman, even go a little farther with her, the man of your dreams will definitely get in on the action ASAP._

Maylene stared. She knew exactly what she had to do, and was not looking forward to it. But if it would gain Sebastian's love, Maylene would even kill herself. She sighed and stood, ready to meet the terror of her adult life head on and make out with it.

There was a knock at the door, and Maylene knew who it was immediately. "Ca va?" the woman at the door asked. "The tailor who indicates the seasons, Nina Hopkins is here!" she said, as she always did, and wrapped Maylene in a hug. "I missed you Maylene!" she said, kissing her. She slipped behind Maylene, groping at her breasts, and slipping her hand into Maylene's stocking.

"Miss Hopkins, please, use the back door," Sebastian said, appearing at the stair case, and putting an emphasis on the words 'back door.'

Maylene realized this was her chance, so she turned and pressed her lips roughly against Nina's. All Maylene had to do was keep her eyes closed and imagine it was Sebastian she was kissing. Nina was startled with Maylene's sudden response to her advances, but quickly got her composure back, and slammed her tongue through Maylene's lips to press their tongues together. Nina quickly smashed Maylene against the wall and began to ravish the maid with all the energy of a young child on a sugar and coffee high. Maylene couldn't help it, she opened her eyes and saw Nina. She almost gagged, but saw the target of her real affections and gained her composure back.

Sebastian, meanwhile just stared, along with Finny and Bard, who had no idea what was going on. Sebastian cleared his throat. "Maylene, Miss Hopkins, if you could please work before you enjoy yourselves. The Young Master is waiting for you."

Maylene almost screamed, he felt nothing even after she'd made out with the one person who terrorized her for two straight years!

"We can continue this later, my dearest Maylene," Nina said, caressing Maylene's cheek fondly before looking up to Sebastian with a sneer. "Mr. Stiff, always ruining my fun," Nina muttered, grudgingly walking up the grand stair case to follow the butler to the Earl. Maylene shuddered just thinking about what Nina would do if she met her again today. Maylene ran off to her room to avoid the woman.

"Maylene! Wait!" Finny yelled after her, but she ignored him and continued running.

_**vii**_

_**Getting Drunk**_

_Chances are, at this point, if you haven't gotten your man yet, it's because he's too scared to take the first step. So you have to make it easy for him to make the first step. Get drunk. It is so much easier for the man to take you if you have no control over yourself. Being drunk also increases your appeal to men._

Maylene just stared. If this didn't work, Maylene was going to murder that Author in her sleep. It was a good thing that the Phantomhive estate was having a party that night, otherwise it would take so long for her to have a chance to get drunk. She began dressing, wearing the unmentionables that she'd bought for use on the last book's advice. She put her maid uniform on, tossing the Lolita dress in the garbage, knowing that the man of her dreams didn't like the dress on her. She applied make up and let her hair down. She thought she looked extremely attractive, and she did.

She walked to the grand hall, where the party was taking place. She was slightly late, but no one seemed to care enough to say anything. She walked right over to the refreshment table, and downed an entire glass of wine in one gulp. She emptied three more glasses before Sebastian grabbed her arm.

"Maylene, if you drink any more, you will have a terrible headache in the mourning."

"I don't care!" Maylene spat, drinking her fifth glass. "All I care about is you!" she said, making everyone in the room stop dancing and look at the two. She wrapped her arms around Sebastian, and pressed her lips to his. Sebastian was shocked senseless as Maylene took his hand and pressed it to her breast. "Take me," Maylene said seductively in his ear.

"Maylene this is very sad," Sebastian said, pushing her off of him.

"What?" Maylene screamed, causing the entire grand hall to fall silent, even the musicians. "I have humiliated and shamed myself just to get you to look at me, and you can barely even do that!" Maylene screamed.

"Okay, Maylene, just calm down," Sebastian said, putting a hand on her shoulder. This was getting out of hand, if it was allowed to continue, the Earl's image would be tattered, and Sebastian would not allow that.

"I won't calm down until you fuck me." Maylene said childishly.

Sebastian sighed, "okay, come on," he said, grabbing her arm. Everyone stared wide-eyed as the two left, Sebastian frowning in annoyance and Maylene smiling like an idiot.

Teehee! I'm leaving it like that. I don't know about you guys, but I love NinaxMaylene it's so cute! 3**  
**


	5. The Day After

Hello! Newest chapter here! I'm thinking of adding maybe one or two more chapters to this. I really wanted to post this sooner, but I've been away, and the internet was down, and all that bad stuff. But here it is! Maylene is so funny. In some parts you'll have to use your imagination!

"Uhh..." Maylene moaned, and rubbed at her eyes. She had a splitting headache. It felt like the whole world was pressing in on her. She groped around on her night stand for her glasses. She put them on and squinted at the table, there sat a glass of water, two pills, and a note. Maylene grabbed the note and read it.

_Maylene,_

_You drank too much last night, you have a hangover._

_Take these pills._

_-Sebastian_

Maylene pressed the note to her breast, and giggled at the thought of having a note to her from Sebastian! When her head protested, she quickly downed the pills. In the blink of an eye, her hangover was gone. _Hail Sebastian!_ Maylene thought, smiling. Maylene stopped. _What happened last night?_

She remembered trying to get drunk, she obviously succeeded on that account. She remembered Sebastian trying to stop her and she yelled at him and made a scene of herself and saying she wouldn't stop until Sebastian f-f-fucked her and he said yes and and and and and, goddammit! Maylene couldn't remember what happened after Sebastian led her out of the grand hall. She blushed. How could she forget something so important? How could she forget her first time?

Sebastian entered Ciel's room, planning to wake him, but found he was already up. "Sebastian," the Earl barked, glaring at his butler. As far as the boy knew, his butler had laid with his maid last night. Ciel was not happy.

"Yes, my Lord?" Sebastian asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Give me head." It was an order Sebastian had heard many times before, but it shocked him with it's boldness. "Did you hear me? I said, 'Give me head.'" Ciel growled.

"Yes my Lord," Sebastian said, bowing respectfully.

"I did not sleep with Maylene, Young Master. I didn't even plan to," Sebastian said after the deed was done. Ciel's flushed face showed shock before the boy was able to contain it.

"Oh really? Then what, pray tell, did you do with Maylene after you left the party?" Ciel spat. Sebastian smirked, remembering exactly what he had done.

"I was bringing her up to her room when she fainted half way up the stairs. I threw her over my shoulder and put her to bed." Sebastian replied coolly. "Are you, perhaps, jealous, my Lord?" Sebastian said, going about the daily routine of preparing the Young Master for the day ahead of him. Ciel jerked at that question and glared ferociously at the tea placed in front of him as his cheeks turned ever so slightly pinker.

"Why on Earth would I be jealous of a maid?" he scuffed. Sebastian smiled at this, and began to dress the Earl.

After Sebastian left, Ciel let out a sigh of relief. Sebastian hadn't had sex with Maylene. Thank God! But if she remembered any of last night, she would think she'd done it with Sebastian. She would blame the alcohol, as little as she'd had, on her supposed lack of memory. This would be a problem. A problem Ciel would have to take care of.

Maylene skipped happily around the manor, attempting to clean it. Unfortunately, even when she put her head into cleaning, she'd make an even bigger mess out of it, leaving Sebastian with more work. Not only that, but her mind was drifting, so that she was doing an even worse job than usual. Sebastian walked around the corner, on his way to the kitchen, and spotted Maylene. He took one look at her work and sighed. Maylene heard the slight sound of Sebastian's breath, and turned, smiling like an idiot. "Sebastian!" she giggled.

"Maylene, I must say your work is most unsatisfact-"

"Sebastian! Let's go for a walk in the garden!" Maylene cried, latching on to his arm. He looked down at her, raising an eyebrow in bewilderment.

"Maylene, get back to work, we have a guest coming this evening, and you've used shoe polish on the woodwork again." Sebastian put a hand to his brow and sighed again.

Much to Sebastian's surprise, Maylene did not become a withering mass of tears at his order. "Oh," she said, smiling mischievously, "I get it. Only after work is over. Gotcha!" Maylene happily skipped off to dust the corners of the rooms, and probably end up breaking most every piece of china in the whole manor. Sebastian sighed yet again. What had he gotten himself into? The Young Master was jealous, and Maylene was clingy.

"Maybe a Phantomhive butler has met his match?" Sebastian muttered as he continued on to the kitchen. He'd take care of the woodwork later.

Ciel glanced at Sebastian as he left the hallway, and slowly walked the direction Maylene had taken. It was obvious when he'd reached the room Maylene was in, as she was singing a stupid love song about Sebastian she'd made up.

"Maylene!" Ciel yelled, startling Maylene out of her day dream. She jumped, and fell on her butt on the rug-covered floor.

"Ye-yes Young Master!" Maylene stammered, saluting him as he entered the room. She'd barely spoken to him before. He was a scary God-like figure, that ruled over the house. Even with all his kindness, Maylene still harbored a secret fear of him. She desperately wished to be a good maid for the boy who'd saved her from the torturous life of an assassin. The Earl seemed to tower over her as she sat on the ground, too scared to get up. He glared down at her, making her even more nervous. "Y-young Master?" Maylene asked, after what seemed like an hour of silence.

"What do you feel for Sebastian, Maylene? Answer me truthfully," he growled, making Maylene shiver.

"Um," Maylene said, looking down at her hands which rested in her lap.

"Well? Speak up, woman!" Ciel barked.

"I love Sebastian, Young Master!" Maylene wailed. Ciel glared.

"What happened last night after you and Sebastian left the party?"

Maylene could feel the poison in the air. "I-I don't remember, Young Master," she said, analyzing the pattern on the floor. She wondered why she'd never noticed how beautifully the reds and browns complimented the greens and golds?

"You don't remember? That's good, because nothing happened." Maylene looked up, shocked. "That's right, nothing happened. Do you want to know why? Because Sebastian is mine, and mine alone. If you so much as brush hands again, you will be punished," he paused for affect, and continued, "understood?"

"Ye-yes Young Master!" Maylene practically screeched.

Ciel gracefully stormed out of the room, leaving Maylene to think. When all that he had said sunk in, Maylene blushed a bright red. Young Master Ciel, and Sebastian? The thought had never occurred to her before, but she liked it. Sebastian had always been a hopeless love, something to fill the time with, she realized now. But the thought of even the smallest gay romance between her two most respected men sent Maylene in a frenzy of smutty day dreams.

Maylene lost all focus on work, and stayed sitting on that rug, until Finny and Bard came looking for her.

Sebastian was glad she had stopped before she'd "cleaned" the whole house. But he was also confused. Why hadn't Maylene found him? Her work was over, and all he had to do was put the Young Master to bed. As he was walking to the Young Master's study to inform him the day was over, he came across Maylene, who did not jump on him as he thought she would, but stood at a distance, staring at him and giggling.

"What is it, Maylene?" he asked, annoyed.

"Nothing," she sang, skipping past him. "Have a good time with the Young Master!" she called, as she made her way back to her own room. Sebastian shook his head, and continued on.

"Young Master, it's time to go to bed," Sebastian said quietly as he entered his master's study. He smiled as he saw that the boy was sleeping soundly, head on his desk. "My silly Young Master," Sebastian muttered fondly, as he picked him up, and carried him to his room. He undressed, and dressed his master, and put him to bed.

"I love you, Ciel," Sebastian said, as he slipped out the door. Little did the butler know, his master was wide awake.


	6. The Real Love, and The End

Ugh... this is pretty short, but I'm getting tired of this story. This will be the end of How to Make Him Fall for You. I really hope the plot twist wasn't too obvious. Just a note on pairings: I hate Bard and Finny in a gay relationship. I don't know why, but I really do. I mean no offence if you like them, but I just don't see them together. Bard is just like this bad-ass stereotypical American, and I don't know, it's just the stereotypical American doesn't seem like he'd be gay.

* * *

"Maylene?" Finny asked, walking up to where Maylene was dusting. She turned to him, seeing he was blushing slightly, and not looking at her.

"Yes?" she asked quizzically. He turned his face completely away from her and stuck out his hand. In it he grasped at beautiful white rose. She could see his ears turning redder and redder.

"For you," he said, as she took the rose from his hand. He immediately dashed away. Maylene looked after him, realizing something. Something that made her both sad and extremely happy at the same time.

Maylene remembered the first time the three of the servants had all been together. It had been extremely awkward, they all came from completely different backgrounds, Maylene being a sharp-shooting assassin, Bard a soldier, and Finny a biologically engineered super-human. As they all became familiar with their duties in the house, they became closer, they became friends. Maylene was happy to be with Bard and Finny all the time, they were funny, somewhat stupid, and a whole lot of fun.

Maylene at first thought very lowly of Bard. He was an American, and she had learned as a child the typical stereotype of an American. Crude and animal-like. But that was not Bard. He was kind beneath the highly Americanized outside. He was gentle, like a father. And he was there when she needed him. Maylene loved Bard, she loved him more than her own father.

Finny had come off at first as an utter moron. He had no knowledge of common things. At first he didn't even know what a flower was. But his idiocy grew on Maylene, and within two weeks of their meeting, she was convinced that he was the cutest thing in the world. He was innocent and sweet. He cried once, when they found a small, dead bird. And like Bard, Finny had a hidden side. He could be strong, not just physically, but his will was strong. If she needed something, even just a pep-talk, Maylene would go to Finny.

Maylene remembered the first time Finny's garden produced a flower. It was a single daisy, but it was his flower. He grew it. It was he that gave it life. He was so proud of it, that he ran into the Young Master's study while Ciel was doing work, just to tell him that he'd managed to grow it. Ciel and Sebastian were unimpressed, but Bard and Maylene threw Finny a party just for that one daisy. Maylene had gushed at how beautiful the flower was for almost an hour, making Finny so happy.

But the next day, the flower was gone from the garden. When Maylene saw this, she'd ran to Finny, crying about it. Finny had calmed her down, and from behind his back, he drew the daisy, in a tiny plant pot. Maylene had stopped crying, and looked Finny in the eyes. He smiled at her, as his cheeks turned pink. Maylene was so happy, she threw her arms around him, and sobbed in happiness until Bard pulled her off him. She kept that daisy until it withered and died. She even held a funeral for it. She loved that flower.

She realized that that was before she'd become utterly infatuated with Sebastian. Before she became a sell-out. She felt horrible. She really just fell in love with Sebastian for the sole reason of his beauty. And Finny had helped her try to gain Sebastian's love. She wondered whether she'd felt as dirty as she did now, back then, and just pushed it out of her mind. She realized her eyes had betrayed her heart and mind. She'd never really loved Sebastian. She'd always had a hidden love for blond-haired blue-eyed super-human boy.

Maylene ran down the hallways, trying to find Finny. She had no idea what she was going to do, but she knew she was going to do something. She found him in the garden. She clutched the white rose to her breast as she neared him. He looked up at her from where he was weeding, and smiled at her. That huge, beautiful, innocent smile. Her heart ached with all the time she'd ignored him, and chosen to pursue a horrible, unclean, impossible romance with the Phantomhive butler. As she neared him, her cheeks grew warm, and she felt uncomfortable. But she knew that this was not the time for her to be uncomfortable, this was the time for the truth to come out.

"Finny," She started.

"I love you," Finny cried, bowing his head, so she could not see the huge blush covering his face. This shocked Maylene speechless. Had he picked up on what she was going to tell him?

"And I know that you may be in love with Sebastian and all, but I really, really, want to tell you. I love you, Maylene. There, I said it again. I love you. I love you!" Maylene couldn't see his face, but she knew, without a doubt, that he was crying. Just like that time Maylene cried into Finny's chest. Maylene ran the short distance between them, and made Finny stand up. He refused to pick his head up, and look her in the eyes, so she placed a hand to his cheek, and held his face close to her's. She saw his tears, his snot, his pain. And she didn't want him to cry. She did not want him to go through more pain, more suffering.

"Maylene-"

"I love you," and she kissed his lips tenderly.

* * *

Now do you all get why Sebastian and Ciel were paired? Maylene was going to end up with Finny from the start!


End file.
